Now normally when I begin a post with "...
I was excited to open his package..." y'all know what to expect. But this, this is a little different. It is different because the package to which I am referring is not of the cock variety, but of the toy variety.
Recently I got an email asking me if I would do some sex toy reviews. My first thought was that it was almost too intimate, to personal - that these kind of reviews would cover a range of things that I didn't necessarily want to talk about: subjects that were uncomfortable, taboo.
So, I decided, if I (a sex-blogging, adulterous, self-proclaimed slut) still have taboos then the best thing to do is conquer them. I refuse to believe in inhibitions, I refuse to be limited in my discussion of all things pleasure related and delightful. I refuse to feel shame or resistance to lust.
Therefore with a little help from the delightful folks at
Eden Fantasys I will be conquering taboos, finding things that either embarrass me or are not to be discussed, doing them and talking about them. With you.
My initial resistance was talking about masturbating. When I was looking through the astoundingly wide variety of toys I could pick to review I told the husband that talking about masturbating almost felt dirty. I told him that I thought I would find it too embarrassing to discuss.
Almost needless to say, the fact that I had such an aversion to the idea of sharing on this subject really pissed me off. I became both concerned and intrigued by my resistance to talking about it.
I realized: I tell you about getting fucked and doing the fucking in ways almost too numerous to count, I talk about my orgasms, my lovers, my thoughts and my feelings. I post semi-naked pictures of myself every week, I tell you about my dirty fantasies and yet talking about pleasuring myself gave me pause.
Let me ask, do you feel more comfortable talking about making him cum then talking about making yourself cum? Because I realized I am far more comfortable talking about a cock in my mouth instead of my own fingers in my panties.
The fact that even some of us who can talk so freely about sex still do not embrace the topic of self-pleasure astonishes me. I remember that I felt very uncomfortable discussing masturbation with even my husband for the first several years we were married. Really, how ridiculous is that? The man has watched me give birth and I can't tell him that I wank?
Does talking about masturbation make me uncomfortable because it is truly sex with no other purpose than self gratification? Am I like those women who can't leave the house unless it is to go to a book club, I only believe in fun with a purpose? Is it that it is a multi-generational taboo? Is it the fact that there is no alternative meaning - no love making, no pleasing of a lover, no procreation - to justify it as an activity? I don't know, maybe it is even as basic as the fact that it ranks as another bodily function and we just don't like to talk about those. Whatever the source of my wanking-complex, there is one.
So, to begin with our journey into the land of taboos let me put something on the table. I masturbate. You heard me. And yes, if you are extra nice to me maybe I will let you watch.
Did you cringe when I said that? Could you say it as well? I have a statcounter and I know that more than a few hundred of you will read this post. I dare you, dirty darlings, scream it from the hills in my comment section. I wank and I am proud.
So, cumming up, a review of my delightful new vibrator. Following that: other topics that are a little taboo. If you have a suggestion, feel free to email me...
Now the only problem is finding the time to masturbate: between a bout of H1N1, two trips to the hospital, a car accident, a big week long meeting for hubby, planning a wedding in which I am the Maid of Honour, and a ridiculous amount of (unpaid) overtime at work - my problem is not only talking about it, but finding the goddamn time to actually do it!